6 months since metastatic diagnosis

Its officially been 6 months since I was diagnosed as metastatic and pretty much given only a few months to live.

This cancer is under control as far as I know at this moment.
I am feeling the effects now of the chemo. I feel sick to the stomach so much. It comes off and on like a wave. I just never know how I will be feeling from one minute to the next. Very frustrating.
I find myself sitting a lot on the bathroom floor spending way too much time staring into the toilet.
My son comes up to me and rubs my back wich is so sweet and makes me feel better. I hate the fact he has to see that but what can I do?
Right now I feel half and half. I have not been eating much the last few days. Total food adversion. I know I have to eat so tomorrow that is my goal.
Its just so hard when I think of food, I think its going to make me sick.
My stomach is paining from throwing up so much.
Its not a fun cycle to get into. Sick so I don't eat and then I am sure I feel even worse since I don't eat.
I am going to pick up some Boost tomorrow so at least I have that.

I have now had the first half of the 9th round of chemo.
This is my week off of chemo which is really good. I just feel I can't do it. I have to do it so I will but its getting harder and harder to talk myself into it.
I noticed that last week as soon as the IV started I started to get sick to the stomach. I know that was all in my mind but still, the whole process is getting a bit much. However, I keep remembering how much good its doing for me so that keeps me in this fight for my life.

My prayers have been blessed a lot. I can't forget to stop and thank God all the time.
My bone scan results came back so awesome like I had mentioned. Now I await the outcome from a routine CT scan.
The scan went well this time. I was not putting up with any crap from the techs/nurses that never listen to me.
I asked for the nurse that knows how to deal with me and my tiny veins. She was there!! I had her and she was no fuss no muss and got the IV going on the first try!!! So nice unlike last time where I believe it took 5 of them and 10 pokes before I got her who ended up telling everyone to do what I had mentioned to do in the first place but who wants to listen to a stupid patient?

It has been 2 months since the last scan so I am eager to see what the results are.
I am scared and excited all at the same time.
Liver tests keep coming back normal so that is a very good sign.
I will know the results on April 6 when I go in for my routine check up with the Oncologist. Unless of course there is something urgent that shows up. Hopefully not!!
I don't mind waiting, I know what I am dealing with and the wait gives me more time to pray about it.

My port was used for the first time last week for drawing blood. A little creepy but I never watched and tried to keep my mind off of it. SO much MUCH easier on me though!!
I went in for my blood work and there was just no way to get anything. My veins are just shot for now.
I was poked quite a few times which sucked since i had to keep one good vein for the IV for the CT scan.
Flat out it was getting blood from a stone. Just not going to happen.

Tonight my son and I went out the front door to clean up my planting mess and found such a beautiful plant all nicely done up with a card attached. We both were so happy to see that!!
We are thought of so much by so many that are caring and helpful. It means so much to me and my family!
I thank everyone for everything. These things help so much to get through tough days. Knowing that people care is another blessing.

Well, back to doing some house work before I crash back into feeling crappy. Hopefully that wont happen tonight!